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Marian Call: Live in Europe

by Marian Call

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1.
Oh, my darling, there is something we must discuss How with cell phone in hand you ran my Volvo through the special bus (And I am more a Volvo than any other kind of car Reliable and safe and Scandinavian and square) You bent in all the corners and you put out all the lights So I wanna know, baby, how you propose to make things right Oooh my darling, when you bounced that check Why didn’t you think the gorram fees would set you so far back Oh my darling sugar pie, why did you stay up all that night And put off your packing and eat too much and miss your flight You knew you’d be miserable after that white lie So why did you why did you why did you why did you why? (Shame on you babe, shame on you babe Always do know what you’ll do, babe You know what you should and shouldn’t'a….) Maybe when you’re older, baby, maybe when you’re sober Then you’ll stop picking zits and picking nits and picking fights! I know I’m far from perfect and I know I’m hardly good But we’d get so much further if you would do what you what you should do – If seeing were caring what a different line we’d take If knowing were doing what a different world we’d make What we want and what we need we very very seldom do I want a smaller waist. I want donuts too. And we visit on each other, oh, the slings of self-defeat And we cannot dodge the arrows of undisciplined retreat I’d be better if my love were not so timid and controlled I’d sleep closer if I were not both so bony and so cold…
2.
Introduction 00:46
3.
Good morning Moon, love, how you doin’? I’ve got business with you today Good evening, Sun, I’ll see you soon I wake on my own terms lately Who’s to say we’re upside-down Who’s to say we’re falling if we miss the ground Who’s to say we’re going nowhere If we like spinning ’round and ’round? Doo doot doot doo… Good morning Stars, love, how you are? Nice we finally see eye to eye Good day to be a speck like me Fast and free, that’s how we fly Who’s to say we’re upside-down Who’s to say we’re falling if we miss the ground Who’s to say we’re going nowhere If we like spinning ’round and ’round? Good morning me, love, where you be? Keep your eyes open wide – Babe, we gonna be all right! Doo doot doot doo… We like we like spinning ’round and ’round. Good morning Moon, love, how you doin’? I’ve got business with you today.
4.
When it’s your first time in Tok and you’re broke and just limping down the line And it’s forty below and you know that they know that you’re a hopeful from Outside And people speak distinctly as if you’re foreign And you forgot to plug your car in And you’re clearly overdressed, even for winter And your self-assurance slowly starts to splinter Oh it takes a little effort to keep your head on straight To laugh as if you mean it, to whistle while you wait It takes a little effort to warm up one more smile To bear another stare, to brave another mile When it’s the first time you could get to West Hollywood and you’re slathered in sunscreen And you drive really slow, so you know that they know that you’re another Joe with a dream And you’re wearing your old secondhand blue jeans And you keep turning your head at limousines And everybody else looks so damn pretty And you’re feelin’ extra grungy and extra indie Oh it takes a little effort to hold your head up straight To dress just like you want to, to whistle while you wait It takes a little effort to not avert your eyes To trust that you belong there — it might just be yourself that you surprise And when you’re hopelessly lost in downtown Austin and the crowd’s too cool for words And you don’t wanna go but you know that they know you’re one of thousands of songbirds And you can’t hardly be heard above the racket ‘Cause everybody there is tryin’ to hack it And you’ve never been compelled to sleep outdoors yet So you’re feelin’ all establishment and corporate Oh it takes a little effort to keep your head on straight To laugh and really mean it, to whistle while you wait It takes a little effort to sometimes plug your ears To play without pretensions, but also without fear Because some of us will never quite feel the thrill of being safe in our own skin When it’s your first time around you might flounder a bit ’til you fit in And although I do heartily admire Folks whose natural graces seem inspired I expect the truly confident are fewer Than I am generally inclined to think And it’s worth a little effort to look ‘em in the eye To whistle while you’re waiting, to flutter ’til you fly Oh, it’s worth a little effort and a lot of honesty It’s worth some work believing It takes a little practice to learn to be
5.
6.
Oh, I wish I were a real Alaskan girl I wish that I could hold my beer I could wear hip waders in summer and heels at ten below I’d have sexy wooly legs with long and flowing frozen hair Oh to be a scowgirl in the Last Frontier Where chicks run the Iditarod and win it Oh, I could wrench on my own goose and I would jerk my own moose And I’d drive a huge domestic truck and actually haul stuff in it A little less sugar, little more spice A whole lot of fire and even more ice From Kotzebue to Ketchikan, from Dead Horse to Attu Alaskan chicks can teach a city girl like me a thing or two Oh, I wish I were a real Alaskan girl Because I hear that they kick ass Oh, it’s easy to see why a local woman’s in demand The guys have to queue up for years to hold your hand I’d find me some big burly bush pilot boy I would hook and reel him in and fiancé him But if he ever double-crossed me or tried to do me wrong I wouldn’t hardly hesitate to skin, gut, and filet him I’d shoot more than a camera at the animals and such I’d eat Rudolph for breakfast and Bullwinkle for lunch Alaskan girls are fearsome and fearless by design They kill mosquitoes with a look and mess with trusting tourists’ minds They’re ruggedly handsome in their way They’re wild and free and meant to be that way So from Jakalof to Juneau raise a glass to a proud and confident and deserving Alaskan woman you know And from Beaver to Tatitlek, here’s to ladies who understand that their self-image should have nothing whatsoever to do with their shade of lipstick I wish I were a real Alaskan girl, but when it comes down to it For most of us, Los Anchorage is gonna have to do it
7.
Highway Five 05:42
I’m packing up again to take a drive down old familiar Highway Five Where every curve feels like a friend I’ve traveled north and south since I was born for family, friends, love, and war I know this road from end to end, hiyiyi This is my coast, this is my home, from San Diego up to Nome Haven’t seen it all yet but I will And I want to memorize it, every inch, want to remember where I’ve been I bless these waves, I bless this wind, I bless this grace and all my sins I mean to take the side streets where I can, maps and the cost of gas be damned The miles are only miles for me So I breeze through my familiar ports of call, Rice Hill, Ukiah, Kelso, all right where I know they’re s’posed to be, hiyiyi… Looks to be a year of go and touch — leaning on my coffee like a crutch With shards of daydreams in my hands And the hot springs and the cold creeks, the lonely Bay and the long long weeks Will frame my jokes & penetrate my plans, hiyiyi … Road’ll grind you down you give it time, but there are those that don’t much mind Our corners start to curving ’til we shine Traveling don’t make me special, no, I am just one more lonely soul Trying hard to try hard to stay kind, yiyiyi This is my ghost, this is my home — millions of miles my mind can’t own No one’s seen it all; no one will But I want to memorize it, every inch, want to remember where I’ve been I bless these waves, I bless this wind, bless this grace & all my sins
8.
9.
Well I had a good time sweetheart, that’s for sure Well I wanna thank you for all your trouble But if you lose my number now I won’t complain ‘Cause you’re my avocado baby — only only good for one day ‘Cause you’re my sushi baby — only only good for one day Well we had a good run pumpkin, that’s for sure Well I wanna thank you for all your hustle But tomorrow I’ll be 500 miles away ‘Cause you’re my faux fur baby — nice and soft but not worth a dime ‘Cause you’re my MTV baby — oh so noisy and not worth my time Well I had a good laugh dollface, that’s for sure Well I wanna thank that extra pitcher But you can stalk me online or at the show Yeah you can call and text and call I won’t be home ‘Cause I think I do it better on my own You’re my new high heels baby — only fun for one day You’re my sushi baby — only only fresh for one day You’re my avocado baby, my avocado baby Only good for one thing
10.
It takes a little Love and Harmony Oh, it takes a lot of will to see That not every one of us is meant to be...a rock star 'Cause not every song has wings to fly And you know some dreams are doomed to die But that, my friend, is why -- that's why -- That's why there's karaoke Karaoke Karaoke Karaoke It takes a little cash and alcohol To make your office party fun at all 'Cause none of us honestly want to listen to you caterwaul Your friends here might enjoy it more if we If we were deaf and dumb and blind, you see But I'm up next. So one more shot and I'll wait patiently -- patiently -- I'll wait for karaoke Karaoke Karaoke Karaoke
11.
All the cool kids keep enthusiasm rationed Right down to the last explosive ounce But I’d rather indulge my many passions Even if my squaritude is overly pronounced Perhaps I do not strike you as a geek Without the horn-rimmed glasses or knee-high argyle socks But nerdery is more than wardrobe-deep And I’m a nerd down in my heart, and that’s where nerdhood rocks Oh, I’m better acquainted than a good girl ought to be With Aragorn and Yo-Saff-Bridge and Worf and HAL and Han But you don’t really know me and my culture don’t control me So don’t you pigeonhole me, cuz my phaser’s set to stun Oh, I have been a nerd since long before I could have heard that Bookish girls should look and act a certain way And I’ll still be a geek when I am utterly antique Because I do not care what normal people say My superpower’s draining fun from parties But if I am a misfit then I’m in good company With Auden, Austen, Hawking, Galileo, and Van Gogh And countless other weirdos whom you really ought to know So stow your expectations — no — I won’t fix your PC And I don’t mind being underrated or ignored The world is much too interesting to entertain ennui So I will never play it cool, and I will never once be bored Oh, I have been a nerd since long before anyone heard that Pale and scrawny was the latest fashion trend And I’ll still be a geek after nobody thinks it’s chic Because I don’t require approval in the end Oh, I have been a nerd since my first (five-syllable) word And no TV series or movie changes that And I’ll still be a geek now Vote for Pedro’s so last week I do not care whether Milan endorses plaid Oh, I have been a nerd since long before anyone heard That pale and scrawny was the latest fashion trend And I’ll still be a geek after nobody thinks it’s chic You will find that I have nothing to defend Oh, I don’t need your approval in the end
12.
Vera flew the coop when she was only soft sixteen She hopped the first and fastest train with some lousy libertine He’d spun a pretty story and he’d stole away her youth And everyone was shocked, ‘cuz Vera always told the truth Oh, her slip surprised ‘em all, ‘cuz Vera always told the truth Oh, but Vera dumped that lyin’ lout in the dust behind the train He’d angled for a child, but he caught a heartless hurricane He wasn’t worth a bullet; she just pushed him off the side And she thanked him for her freedom — she was eternally polite Oh, Vera thanked him for his trouble, cuz she was nothin’ but polite Li li li li… Vera ran with lawless men who trembled when she talked She never flinched, she never smiled, and her gun was always cocked By twenty-one she’d terrorized the whole of the frontier They feared her fateful justice, for they knew Vera was sincere Oh, they ran from Vera’s posse cuz she was perfectly sincere Vera rode alone the whole of her ferocious life She never met a boy she didn’t think deserved the knife Not a one of them was worthy in her steady steely eyes Cuz they all fronted for their flaws, and Vera always sneered at lies Yes, she found all men were liars, and Vera couldn’t live with lies Li li li li… It was not till Vera’s dying day her hard heart met desire For the man who shot her through was the only man she could admire That mortal wound awoke in her a fire no balm could soothe – She said, “I think I love you,” and Vera always told the truth As she died, she said, “I love you,” and Vera always told the truth Li li li li…
13.
In the Black 05:03
You’re in the black – in the black – in the black — ain’t it lovely baby Not coming back, in the black – ain’t you free No more debts – no more threats – you’re in the black, baby Left it all behind – must feel fine – must feel fine But we — we wish we could see you We thought you might find time to write us now and then You’re free — now and you’re lonely I love you, but please do not ask me to pretend Come home if you want a friend I’m right on task – since you asked – I’m doing great, really I am I don’t blink, I don’t think, I just press on, press on I’m doing fine – I’m not inclined to crack anytime soon baby Left us all behind but we’re still fine – swear we’re fine But we cry for no reason Late at night when we run out of thoughtless things to do You’re free now and you’re lonely Please come home so we can cry with you I hear that you cry too We cannot bring you back when home’s not home We can’t make you pay debts you will not own We cannot reason with the unforeseen We can’t compromise when there’s no in-between But we — we wish we could see you We thought you might find time to write us now and then You’re free — now and you’re lonely I love you, but please do not ask me to pretend Come home if you want a friend
14.
You don’t know how lovely you are Sweet sweet soul With dark dark eyes Head to heel beautifully marred Sweet sweet soul Forgive my surprise I know you see right through me But please don’t look away I’ll comfort you if you’ll cling to me We’ll cry and we’ll wait for the day Oh, I wish you could see what I see Sweet sweet soul Dark dark eyes You don’t know how dangerous you are Sweet sweet soul With small small hands I’d tell you the truth, but it’s hard Sweet sweet soul You don’t comprehend But I’ll sing you every known love song Until you can sleep through the night I’ll stay by your side if you’ll have me, love I’ll hold you until you don’t fight Oh, I wish you could see what I see Sweet sweet soul Dark dark eyes
15.
I’m not sexy, but I really want to be I hear that’s normal for my demographic I don’t look good in skirts, and even wedges hurt my feet And I can’t keep a straight face and say ‘orgasmic’ Oh, I’m not hip, but I really want to be All the bands I like you’ve heard of, and I watch too much TV And I’m not cute, and I think too hard to be sweet But not enough to get a real job or converse insightfully – This is the part where you politely disagree. My virtues are too dull to entertain, but you can always count on me. A nicely balanced budget’s less than thrilling, and courtesy’s outdated, and sobriety is lame Reliability is not appealing But I don’t know any other way to be I love people and I want them to love me My virtues are vanilla at best, but you can always call on… I’ll sing for you, I’ll sing for you I’ll be the first one by your side And the last one to leave I’ll give you everything I’ve got, I’ll get you anything you need I’m not much to entertain, But you can always call on me I’m sorry I’m not meaner I’m sorry I don’t bite I’m sorry I don’t break as many hearts as you might like I’m not hip or cute or spontaneous or sweet, And I know that I’m such a fool, But I’ll love you real good if you’ll let me make a dumb mistake or two. Oh, I’m not sexy, but I’ll love you if you let me… My baby took me out one Saturday night, and I could tell he could tell I’m a square I asked him, ‘baby, where are we goin’?’ and he said, ‘apparently nowhere.’ He said-a ‘you don’t bark and you don’t bite, so what use have I got for you?’ I said, ‘my crimes may not be half so entertaining as yours, but let me tell you baby what I can do… I’ll sing for you, I’ll sing for you I’ll be the first one by your side And the last one to leave I’ll give you everything I’ve got, I’ll get you anything you need I’m not much to entertain, But you can always call on me
16.
Anchorage 07:21
Today my childish laughter falls away / the stakes were real and we won’t feel okay With a knot of bitter worry in my eyes / and a tearless year or two since the last day The last damn day, the last day that I cried No no no no / take me back home / no no no no / take me away Bring her ’round slow / no no no no Tie her up right / I’ll sail round the night / I’ll dock when it’s day No no no no / I got no home / no no no no / only a way Bring her ’round slow / no no no no I know where I’ll land / I’ll unclench my hands / I’m willing to stay So see me down, see me down to the edge of the wild Stroll me out to the end of the pier Reel me in to the places we knew our own faces Over wine, over coffee and beer And anchor me anchor me anchor me anchor me here Walk with me, the sunset’s three hours long tonight / we’ll blind our disbelieving eyes with light And if the dusk admits our fear of death / we’ll write a worthy hymn and cork it fast Cork it fast, we’ll float it west No no no no / got a ring full of keys / no no no no / not a one of ‘em mine Bring her ’round slow / no no no no Fold up the maps / if love goes by haps / why look for a sign No no no no / I got no home / no no no no / only a way Bring her ’round slow / no no no no The water’s not clear / but I’ve washed ashore here / and I’m willing to stay So see me down, see me down to the edge of the wild Stroll me out to the end of the bow Point me back to the places we knew our own faces Without wondering much why or how And anchor me anchor me anchor me anchor me now My body and my mind have scarcely met / I’ve spent my whole life being elsewhere and elsewhen So ground me in the only house I own / forgive my absence, love — and teach me to live Teach me to live, to live alone, no no no no, see me down, see me down… And anchor me anchor me anchor me anchor me here
17.
They drank all the pilsner and ate all the oranges And she thought as the rotten and rusty door hinges Squealed as he left, how remarkably deftly How utterly thoroughly he’d failed to confess He’d evaded the point and eluded the mood She meant to convey when she laid out the food Even put up her hair, but the boy wouldn’t bite And it was almost sexy, but not quite. Still how could she fret when she’d won that small bet With a well-meaning friend who had sworn it would end With a kiss and a cry and a happy reveal (For what man could resist such a gem of a meal?) She’d collect on the cash, but her victory stung She cursed at the cat that had captured her tongue She broke out the chocolate and started to write And it was almost helpful, but not quite. “Dear Sir, I’ve been dropping hints like bricks on you. We were both rehearsing for this awkward interview. I’m done with making small talk and I’m done with being scared, Because I heard from a friend of a friend That you came with your speaking points prepared. Dear Sir, I am taking matters into my own hands. I hope I do not dry your interest if I dare to take this chance. Do not underestimate me, boy; look closer and you’ll find That if you peel back the polite, there might be something fierce inside! “Remember the fête where the two of us met? (Less a bolt from the blue, more our social ineptness) The cool kids swarmed but you clung to the corner, And that’s why my poor heart, before I could warn her, Broke from the bunch to bolt to your side – The rest of me followed, a bit starry-eyed. And you took off your hat and you bought me some wine, And it was almost awkward — but not quite. “Well, we are not so much for big parties and such (We’d rather observe than be part of the crush), So you unpacked your camera to frame the good times, And I nabbed a used napkin to scribble some lines. The chemistry swept us both off our toes – You shot no one else — I couldn’t compose – And you said I was sweet, nearly kissed me goodnight, And it was almost perfect, but — not — quite – “Dear Sir, You’ve been dropping hints like bombs on me. I have this file of evidence — see exhibits A and B. I’m done with making small talk and I’m done with being scared, Because I noticed just how many times tonight you ran your fingers through your hair. Dear Sir, I am taking matters into my own hands. I think that I might love you, and I hope you’ll understand That if I beat you to the punch, it’s just because my patience tried – And if you peel back the polite, there might be something fierce inside! “From that day to this, your timidity’s disenchanted me. You were looking so longing, why couldn’t you say you wanted me? I could vow that I’ll hate you with all of my will, But unfortunate me, you can see how I’ll fail. I’ve been waiting a year — I’ve been waiting for you – I’ve been biting my tongue, and I’m almost through. “Dear Sir, I am dropping my last guard for you. I’m fearful and I’m foolish and I’m agitated too. All this anticipation without consummation, it’s hard on a poor girl’s pride And though I doubt I’ll send this letter — If I did you’d see how I’ve tried.”
18.
Babe I love your windowsill You asked me here, I think I will So settle in and cock your ear Because this birdie likes to sing you The songs you like to hear But babe you better behave Watch your mouth and wash your face Lock up the dog and turn off your phone And don’t think you can take me home ‘Cause I’m a free bird I’m a free little bird So set your net aside And lock your cage up in the closet Not gonna say what you want me to Play what you want me to Stay where you want me to Fly — when you see just how high I go You’ll surely know I don’t just sing for you. You can beg and plead and say you need me But you don’t. And if my independence vexes you I’m sure you’ll cope. Find some other hen to hold. So babe I’ll decorate your windowsill Enjoy and keep a picture if you will But in a stitch I got to fly And babe I think that you know you know why ‘Cause I’m a free bird I’m a free little bird So set your net aside And lock your cage up in the closet Not gonna say what you want me to Play what you want me to Rhyme when you want me to Fly — when you see just how high I go You’ll finally know There’s things I won’t sing — even for you.
19.
Oh, when you kiss m-me goodnight, I wonder If you could ever mean as much to me as I do to you I fret ‘n’ fumble with my thoughts; I want you But only on my terms and on my time, I want it perfect and easy How to want you, how to give you what you deserve to get How to tell you what my heart doesn’t feel just yet How to be a good girl, how I try, oh my But still, you love me, you love me, love me… And something in me must love you too Or else why would I write this song about you? Oh, lately I’ve been thinking about your sweet, sweet smile And whether I am right to let you fight for my so-twisted heart ‘f’I had the time I’d make you mine; you’re beautiful And I am oh so wrong to let this song say how I’ll never deserve you, no no I think instead of feel, but if that’s okay with you I will be your dearest friend — I’ll be your lover too And I will never ever leave if you will have me now But dear, the trouble is with love — trouble is with love – I’m not sure if my heart will ever know how And something in me must love you too Or I’d be able to breathe when I think when I think about you, ooh I’ve half a mind to take some time with you… I fret ‘n’ fumble with my thoughts, but I don’t feel anything… I wish I knew if I could love you too…

about

As part of the Marian Call European Adventure Quest (www.kickstarter.com/projects/mariancall/marian-call-european-adventure-quest), Marian presents her first proper LIVE album, all the way from Europe.

These songs were recorded at three Marian Call concerts -- two in London and one in Osnabrück, Germany.

The tracks actually sound live; the rooms sound like real rooms, full of people and clinking glasses, sometimes with echoes and buzzes and phones. Through all that, we've done our best to bring you to a really real Marian Call concert. "Honest" performances were selected over perfect ones, so a forgotten line and a cough or so are kept in to preserve the most passionate interpretations of the songs.

The album is made possible through the support of *tons* of awesome fans and volunteers, through Kickstarter and on the ground in Europe. It is also graced by the work of the amazing professionals and volunteers listed below.

credits

released February 4, 2013

- Scott Barkan - guitar
scottbarkan.bandcamp.com

- Steve Lawson - recording engineer in London at the Mad Hatter Hotel
stevelawson.net

- Lukas Pietruschka - recording engineer in Osnabrück at MOJO Soulfood Café
twitter.com/Luke3C

- Nick Trepka - recording engineer in London at the White Lion Pub

- Mixed and mastered by Bryan Ray in Austin, TX
lonelychild.bandcamp.com

- Marian Call - vocals, typewriter, kazoo
mariancall.com

All songs written by Marian Call except for track 7, "Love and Harmony," co-written by Marian Call and Joel Hermansen (www.reverbnation.com/joelhermansen), used by permission.
Produced by Marian Call; copyright Marian Call 2012, ASCAP.

London concert photos were taken by Craig Richmond and used by permission; the snowy armor photos are by Valette Keller, studiovalette.com, used by permission; see more from the photo shoot at www.flickr.com/photos/valette/sets/72157630338274326/.

The armor itself was made by Chris Cushman in Anchorage, AK, www.facebook.com/pages/Penguin-Arms/172408626146626. It placed at the 2012 Object: Runway wearable art contest!

The 8-bit Marian Call illustration, the Adventure Questing map, and all MCEAQ graphic design was done by the amazing Adam Levermore, adamlevermore.com.

Album artwork and pen-and-ink illustrations by Marian Call.

Special thanks to our supportive recording venues; thanks to David Geißler at MOJO Soulfood Cafe, www.cafe-mojo.de/main.php, Phil Curtin and the White Lion Pub, fancyapint.com/Pub/london/white-lion/265, and Joe and Louis at the Mad Hatter Hotel, www.madhatterhotel.co.uk. Thanks also to the fans who helped to coordinate these shows: Lukas Pietruschka, Dave Baseley and LOTNA, Gianni “Dakkar” Ceccarelli, and Susan, Benjamin, Georgia, and Peter Coblenz.

Soulful gratitude goes out to Katie Moest, Minion-in-Chief, who often held the raggedy little tour and recording operation together behind the scenes. She is also an amazing art director, set dresser, and props master, and if you're in L.A. you should find her: www.katiemoest.com

Thanks to Scott Barkan for his patience, endurance, and willingness to go on ridiculous journeys like this. Thanks to Patrick Race for schlepping gear all over Europe, documenting the trip, and keeping spirits high.

Last of all, heartfelt thanks to the Kickstarter supporters all over the globe who demanded that this album exist. I'm so glad you Adventure Quested with me. This album belongs to you!

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Marian Call Alaska

Marian Call has things to say. She sounds a little like Ingrid Michaelson meets They Might Be Giants & Regina Spektor for bourbon & laughs, which sounds improbable, but give it a try. She hails from Alaska and tours North America and Europe, and she lives on Twitter. Her songs are quirky, sharp, surprising confections in every genre full of rich dark carmelized sugar, savor, & spice. ... more

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