Vanilla

by Marian Call

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  • Compact Disc (CD) + Digital Album

    A CD in a carbon-neutral digipak made from post-consumer recycled materials. Vegan and gluten-free. Comes shrink-wrapped. This disc will be going out of print sometime in the coming year, and will not be reprinted for the time being.

    Includes unlimited streaming of Vanilla via the free Bandcamp app, plus high-quality download in MP3, FLAC and more.
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  • Streaming + Download

    Includes unlimited streaming via the free Bandcamp app, plus high-quality download in MP3, FLAC and more.
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  • Full Digital Discography

    Get all 21 Marian Call releases available on Bandcamp and save 30%.

    Includes unlimited streaming via the free Bandcamp app, plus high-quality downloads of Glitter, Dammit, Cuss!, Swears!, Music from the Play 'Franklin' by Samantha Noble, Patreon Content! Patreontent., Standing Stones, Pure Imagination, Come On and Take Your Sweetie to the Stars, and 13 more. , and , .

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1.
Fret 03:04
Oh, when you kiss m-me goodnight, I wonder If you could ever mean as much to me as I do to you I fret ‘n’ fumble with my thoughts; I want you But only on my terms and on my time, I want it perfect and easy How to want you, how to give you what you deserve to get How to tell you what my heart doesn’t feel just yet How to be a good girl, how I try, oh my But still, you love me, you love me, love me… And something in me must love you too Or else why would I write this song about you? Oh, lately I’ve been thinking about your sweet, sweet smile And whether I am right to let you fight for my so-twisted heart ‘f’I had the time I’d make you mine; you’re beautiful And I am oh so wrong to let this song say how I’ll never deserve you, no no I think instead of feel, but if that’s okay with you I will be your dearest friend — I’ll be your lover too And I will never ever leave if you will have me now But dear, the trouble is with love — trouble is with love – I’m not sure if my heart will ever know how And something in me must love you too Or I’d be able to breathe when I think when I think about you, ooh I’ve half a mind to take some time with you… I fret ‘n’ fumble with my thoughts, but I don’t feel anything… I wish I knew if I could love you too…
2.
You don’t know how lovely you are Sweet sweet soul With dark dark eyes Head to heel beautifully marred Sweet sweet soul Forgive my surprise I know you see right through me But please don’t look away I’ll comfort you if you’ll cling to me We’ll cry and we’ll wait for the day Oh, I wish you could see what I see Sweet sweet soul Dark dark eyes You don’t know how dangerous you are Sweet sweet soul With small small hands I’d tell you the truth, but it’s hard Sweet sweet soul You don’t comprehend But I’ll sing you every known love song Until you can sleep through the night I’ll stay by your side if you’ll have me, love I’ll hold you until you don’t fight Oh, I wish you could see what I see Sweet sweet soul Dark dark eyes
3.
Oh, my darling, there is something we must discuss How with cell phone in hand you ran my Volvo through the special bus (And I am more a Volvo than any other kind of car Reliable and safe and Scandinavian and square) You bent in all the corners and you put out all the lights So I wanna know, baby, how you propose to make things right Oooh my darling, when you bounced that check Why didn’t you think the gorram fees would set you so far back Oh my darling sugar pie, why did you stay up all that night And put off your packing and eat too much and miss your flight You knew you’d be miserable after that white lie So why did you why did you why did you why did you why? (Shame on you babe, shame on you babe Always do know what you’ll do, babe You know what you should and shouldn’t’a….) Maybe when you’re older, baby, maybe when you’re sober Then you’ll stop picking zits and picking nits and picking fights! I know I’m far from perfect and I know I’m hardly good But we’d get so much further if you would do what you what you should do – If seeing were caring what a different line we’d take If knowing were doing what a different world we’d make What we want and what we need we very very seldom do I want a smaller waist. I want donuts too. And we visit on each other, oh, the slings of self-defeat And we cannot dodge the arrows of undisciplined retreat I’d be better if my love were not so timid and controlled I’d sleep closer if I were not both so bony and so cold…
4.
Rapid City into Denver, Denver to Chicago Chicago into Houston into Phoenix into home Blue into white and down to gray, now I see green And every time we land, I swear I feel so childish and alone Cream into butter Water into wine Takes a little magic And a little time… (I hate to fly.) That very first prom night, how I floated to your car With flowers and delusions tied so tight upon my wrists I remember how your hair smelled, how my heart beat, how you scared me Into clinging to the lawn with perfect prom nails & white-knuckled fists I thought I’d float away And I didn’t want to go Tumbling off the earth, into the deep, into the dark Out of control Because flying feels like falling, flying feels like falling When I close my eyes… So I’ll clutch the plastic armrests and I’ll sway side to side With my seatbelt tight, eyes open wide To get to you, I’ll take this ride I’m lazy, but I like hard work, shoulder to the plough A heavy head feels good in bed, but I don’t sleep nohow And minutes into hours into staring at the wall My mind will not surrender into darkness into deeply dream at all Water into wine Takes a little pressure And a lot of time… Flying feels like falling, flying feels like falling When I close my eyes… Down I go. Every child knows how and why they’re hated I hid my papers from the class, and I tore up my tests ‘Til unfulfilled potential was my very own pet monster And it beat me when I failed and when I didn’t care And when I did my best To turn this rubbish into rhyme Every time you travel It takes so much courage, oh, and so much time Flying feels like falling, flying feels like falling When I close my eyes… Flying feels like falling and the altitude’s appalling And my starboard engine’s stalling And I dunno if I glide Flying feels like falling Oh the ground is calling Come down or I will break you What would make you think I’d let you in the sky? Ooh, to get to you I’ll take this ride…
5.
Sun-soaked skin shines hot and golden Inside the glare the sky is white A boundless yawn engulfs the lawn Where dreams are drunk on blazing light Sprawled carelessly upon the grass The edges of my dress creep high How light the streams of balmy beams Stroking soft across my thigh Virginia Woolf naps there beside me Pen falls from hand to find its rest Eyelids drift, no lashes lift And gently rises, falls my breast Sleep and wake and time mean nothing Til five o’clock comes far too soon But daisy-haired and shoulders bared How sweet was Sunday afternoon
6.
Prologue 00:10
7.
Vanilla 05:00
I’m not sexy, but I really want to be I hear that’s normal for my demographic I don’t look good in skirts, and even wedges hurt my feet And I can’t keep a straight face and say ‘orgasmic’ Oh, I’m not hip, but I really want to be All the bands I like you’ve heard of, and I watch too much TV And I’m not cute, and I think too hard to be sweet But not enough to get a real job or converse insightfully – This is the part where you politely disagree. My virtues are too dull to entertain, but you can always count on me. A nicely balanced budget’s not so thrilling, and courtesy’s outdated, and sobriety is lame Reliability is not appealing But I don’t know any other way to be I love people and I want them to love me My virtues are vanilla at best, but you can always call on… I’ll sing for you, I’ll sing for you I’ll be the first one by your side And the last one to leave I’ll give you everything I’ve got, I’ll get you anything you need I’m not much to entertain, But you can always call on me I’m sorry I’m not meaner I’m sorry I don’t bite I’m sorry I don’t break as many hearts as you might like I’m not hip or cute or spontaneous, And I know I’m such a fool, But I’ll love you real good if you’ll let me make a dumb mistake or two. Oh, I’m not sexy, but I’ll love you if you let me… My baby took me out one Saturday night, and I could tell he could tell I’m a square I asked him, ‘baby, where are we goin’?’ and he said, ‘apparently nowhere.’ He said-a ‘you don’t bark and you don’t bite, so what use have I got for you?’ I said, ‘my crimes may not be half so entertaining as yours, but let me tell you baby what I can do… I’ll sing for you, I’ll sing for you I’ll be the first one by your side And the last one to leave I’ll give you everything I’ve got, I’ll get you anything you need I’m not much to entertain, But you can always call on me Not sexy, no, not sweet, but I’ll sing for you if you want me to… Not hip, not cute, not sweet, not even solvent baby But I love you, oh I love you, I love you, I love you baby
8.
Postmortem 00:06
9.
I'm Yours 04:30
So this is faith — so this is hope So this is stepping way beyond what I can know So here’s my life — I’ve chosen you Because I’m trusting who you are and what you’ll do I’m lost, I’m through And I’m yours I have to believe in your love Because now I’m yours So this is love — so this is grace That certain happy glow familiar on your face You look like home — so warm and real and true I feel the afterglow of God all over you Like a new day your light breaks through And I’m yours — I don’t promise you perfection But I’m yours — take this poor heart and protect it I’m yours I’m leaning on your love Because now I’m yours We will fight the good fight, we will wrestle with life On the same side And we’ll dream and we’ll doubt, face reality now On the same side So this is faith — so this is joy So this is harmony and dissonance And love defying loneliness Now I’m yours — you’ve caught me and you’ll keep me I’m yours — I lay down my life completely I’m yours And you are mine now, love I have fallen, I have chosen I’m yours
10.
None of us is fine None of us is good Most of us are nice When we feel we really should be Nice won’t get us far ‘Cause none of us is fine None of us is fine Stop what you’re doing and cry for a while For all of the people that need you Lay down your head and lay down your denial You should, but you can’t bring yourself to Be real, be there, get up, try to care Let your lack overwhelm you, let your selfishness bleed away For at least an hour every day None of us is fine None of us is good Most of us are nice When we feel we really should be Nice won’t get us far ‘Cause none of us is fine None of us is fine Stop what you’re doing and laugh for a while At all of your foolish ambition Deluded and fragile and brave, like a child Who still thinks life comes with a mission Drop your sword and your flag, get your sponge and your rag Let the mirror remind you, let your fairy-tale dreams melt away For at least one hour every day None of us is fine None of us is good Most of us are nice When we feel we really should be Nice won’t get us far ‘Cause none of us is fine None of us is fine
11.
Your Fault 03:37
You make a really lovely victim, darling Especially so made up and so attractively lighted And you could not have picked a nicer setting To flatter the delusions you’ve invited And I know just what you’re saying And I know just what you’re not And I wonder how you’ll get along When your composure’s shot And where will you go when you finally know how it’s all your fault Messy house, messy life, messed up kids, your first wife, they’re all your fault Your platitudes were perfect, except for when they weren’t Your logic always flawless and your lessons so well learned Thankful as I am for all the tools you gave to me I will wield them all like weapons if you get close enough to see And you know just what I’m saying And you don’t know what I’m not And you know that I’m not playing And you know that I have thought this through Over and over again, oh, over and over again And where will you go when you finally know how it’s all your fault Messy house, messy life, messed up kids, your first wife, they’re all your fault And what will you say when you finally see how it’s all your fault Nothing you can do about anyone but you it’s true it’s all your fault (And don’t you tell me, don’t you tell me, don’t you say you didn’t know) Where will you go when you finally know how it’s all your fault Messed-up kids, messy house, messed-up life, that one spouse, it’s all your fault You make a really lovely victim, darling Especially so made up and so attractively lighted And you could not have picked a nicer setting To flatter the delusions you’ve invited
12.
Woke up, it was a Chelsea morning and the first thing that I heard Was a song outside my window, and the traffic wrote the word And it came a-ringin’ up like Christmas bells And a-rappin’ up like pipes and drums Oh, won’t you stay? We’ll put on the day And we’ll wear it ’til the night comes Woke up it was a Chelsea morning and the first thing that I saw Was the sun through yellow curtains and a rainbow on my wall Blue, red, green and gold to welcome you, crimson crystal beads to beckon Oh, won’t you stay? We’ll put on the day There’s a sun show every second Now the curtain opens on a portrait of today And the streets are paved with passers-by And pigeons fly and papers lie A-waiting to blow away Woke up it was a Chelsea morning and the first thing that I knew There was milk and toast and honey and a bowl of oranges too And the sun poured in like butterscotch and stuck to all my senses Oh, won’t you stay? we’ll put on the day And we’ll talk in present tenses When the curtain closes and the rainbow runs away I will bring you incense owls by night By candlelight, by jewel light If only you will stay – Pretty baby, won’t you wake up, it’s a Chelsea morning

about

Marian's frisky alt-folk debut album, made with the help of friends and family in Seattle and Alaska. Clever, sweet, pure and tasty acoustic music that has garnered fans across all age groups & nationalities. For more information, visit mariancall.com. To connect with Marian, visit twitter.com/mariancall or facebook.com/mariancallmusic.

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released September 24, 2007

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Marian Call Alaska

Marian Call has things to say. She sounds a little like Ingrid Michaelson meets They Might Be Giants & Regina Spektor for bourbon & laughs, which sounds improbable, but give it a try. She hails from Alaska and tours North America and Europe, and she lives on Twitter. Her songs are quirky, sharp, surprising confections in every genre full of rich dark carmelized sugar, savor, & spice. ... more

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